This is one of those issues that magically create a tight atmosphere and still it brings out that smile in me as I am very well aware of the fact that exactly matching the expected female part. Going to a restaurant with me or ordering from a delivery-service is a serious challenge for every man’s nerves. I am the most annoying person when it comes to decision-making however at least I know it!

Let me give you an example:

My man took me to an Italian restaurant as we both decided Pizza would be a fabulous idea. PIZZA, how simple could “ordering” get? They list any possible combination of toppings anyway. You know what? WE DON’T CARE!!!

My man’s order is similar to this: “A Pizza Cipolla hot with extra garlic please”. Then my ordering session started and that sounded like this: “Excuse me could you be so kind and tell me where the Prosciutto comes from?” The waiter said: “I have no idea, but I can ask” By the way there would not be any appropriate answer as right there I said: “no need I don’t like Prosciutto when it is warm anyway”. I looked at my man and said: “Remind me of that, I have to tell you something later” and then my face turned back down at the menu. After some more minutes I said: “What kind of Frutti di mare are on pizza 475” and this pure guy really started explaining, which was a total waste of time as I just spared an “aha” for him and got back to the menu. I had to tell my man each and every pizzas toping I didn’t like and the waiter for sure really enjoyed standing there and listening. Then I finally decided what I wanted to eat so I started: “I would like a Pizza Prosciutto, Pizza 143 without Prosciutto; instead I would love some extra Mozzarella and egg. Please leave out the basil and instead make them put some sweat corn on my pizza, make it hot and add some onions and extra garlic too please.” After this I always make this happy face the Napoleon for had on when he won his first battle in 1796 against Austria. I fought like a man and I won the battle against the pizza menu like a hero. As the waiter was immature and ignorant he said: “so you basically want a pizza Provinciale with egg?”

Oh yesss he doesn’t have any understanding, no creativity, no understanding and as I am there I knew he will loose his self-respect as well in case I start talking. So I decided to just ignore him and in case I will ever go there again—haha, then I will order, my God. Next time I will torture him when I order, yessssssssss.

Funny enough until then I don’t even get that I already did and that he just paid me back.

The best of it all is that when we get our food, it is never as good as we think it will be but contrasting to our Pizza yours is ALLWAYS great. Why do men always have to stick together? But we are smart, we piss the waiter off and still we get a great pizza because we will eat yours.

Got the point??? See it is really simple!

HIRPIT